The Perfect Wedding

I went to a wedding today. The happy, young couple found each other as students at Grove City College - the same school where I met and fell in love with my wife, Dorry more than 30 years ago. Dorry officiated today's service, and from my vantage point, it went off without a hitch (except, of course, that the bride and groom got hitched). It all looked so effortless. But I know better. Months of thought, planning and attention to detail came into focus in that service. Nothing was left to chance. 

And while today's wedding service and reception were wrapped up in half a day, I read in one of my dad's sermons that a wedding in Jesus' time was a much longer and more elaborate affair than your typical modern-day version:

"In ancient Palestine, a wedding was quite the occasion. It usually lasted for more than a day. The ceremony itself took place late in the evening, after a feast. Then the couple was led through the village streets by the light of torches and with a canopy over their heads. There was no honeymoon. The couple stayed at home, and for a week they held an open house. They wore crowns and bridal robes. They were treated like a king and queen, and for this week their word was law. In a culture, where life was a constant matter of survival, this week of celebration was a welcome relief."

"There was a wedding in Cana of Galilee. Jesus' mother was there, and Jesus and his disciples were also invited to the celebration. When the wine ran out, Jesus' mother said to him, 'They don't have any wine.'" John 2:1-2 (CEB)

"For a Jewish feast, wine was essential. 'Without wine', said the rabbis, 'there is no joy.' To have the wine run out like this before the guests had gone was a horrible violation of the sacred duty of hospitality. It was a humiliation for the bride and bridegroom and the whole family. It was the sort of situation that our worst nightmares are made of. Little wonder then, that Mary came to Jesus frantic over this wine situation. ...

Here was a microcosm of  what the human struggle is all about. Here were good people trying to push and pound and mold a small, stubborn segment of time into exactly the form they wanted. Was this too much to ask of life? And now, despite their best efforts, it was all falling apart before their very eyes. They had run out of wine.  

Life is very much like the perfect wedding. Everything is set from the flowers to the tuxedos. But rare is the wedding where something doesn't happen to set us on edge. The flower girl goes on a sit-down strike; the bride is 20 minutes late; the minister calls the groom by the wrong name. In a wedding, these things often can be laughed at later. But in real life, the snafus are sometimes tragic, and irreparable harm can be done. A spouse is unfaithful; children refuse to fulfill the dreams we had for them; and then the terrible specter of illness or accident raises its ugly head.  This life is not fair, not even for good and prudent people. As soon as we understand this and let go of the illusion that we can plan and execute the perfect life, we will be ready to hear the Good News ... "   

"Nearby were six stone water jars used for the Jewish cleansing ritual, each able to hold about twenty or thirty gallons. Jesus said to the servants, 'Fill the jars with water,' and they filled them to the brim. Then he told them, 'Now draw some from them and take it to the headwaiter,' and they did. The headwaiter tasted the water that had become wine. ... The headwaiter called the groom and said, 'Everyone serves the good wine first. They bring out the second-rate wine only when the guests are drinking freely. You kept the good wine until now.' This was the first miraculous sign that Jesus did in Cana of Galilee." -John 2:6-11 (CEB)

"The Good News -- the wine that used to be water -- is that in spite of our brokenness and imperfection, in spite of our sins and failures, in spite of our struggles and humiliations, we are loved. We are loved for who we are, not for what we have accomplished. We are loved, accepted and forgiven. In this love there is a security that the worst tragedy in life cannot touch. In this love there is a promise that one day all the troubles that afflict us now, all the tragedies that now seem so invincible, will evaporate and be as nothing in the light of God's eternal presence. Jesus came to turn our water into wine.  He came to give us a home, both here and hereafter. What God creates is better than what anyone can manufacture. The moment we realize this is the moment of our own personal miracle, the moment of our salvation, the moment of freedom at last, the moment of true joy.

And so that day in Cana, the wedding went on, and those who were responsible for planning it relaxed and enjoyed themselves for the first time all week. They danced, and sang, and ate, and drank, and quietly noted that what made the perfect wedding was not all their planning, but the fact that Jesus was there."

From: "The Perfect Wedding"

Scripture: John 2:1-12

Preached at Paoli United Methodist Church